The other day I was driving and saw the following license plate:

MARS 9 - What does it mean?

MARS 9 - What does it mean?

I've never been an enthusiast of having vanity plates myself;  my mom always said a vanity plate is like shouting to the world that you have more money than you need and so "please come rob me".  Besides I have stickers all over my car anyway so I can find my car in parking lots.  Sure it makes my car look insane, but after getting into other peoples' car two or three times by accident (I can't believe how many people don't lock their car doors) I decided it was better to have crazy stickers.

Anyway, I like reading vanity plates to figure out what they mean.  But this one confuses me.  MARS 9...

Is this person a fan of the Space program?  Do they want to go to Mars and "MARS 1-8" were taken?  Or maybe they like Mars candy bars?  Maybe they're fans of the Veronica Mars show.  Or they might be a Hellenic pagan;  I hear they're making a comeback.  Perhaps the driver is a spiritualist, or an astrologer, or an Aries, born in the House of Mars.  Or maybe it is an oblique reference to Iron, since Mars is the alchemical symbol for iron (I only know that because I was in Alpha Chi Sigma in college and history of alchemy was part of the initiation ritual... nerd!).  Or maybe it is someone who really likes men a lot...  you know, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Michigan". 

So not really a helpful license plate if the intent was to tell me about the driver.

And then there is that "9".  Sure, it might just be a random number.  But what if it stands for the German word "nein" (meaning "no")?  In that case, the driver is trying to tell me, "No, enough money spent on the Martian expeditions!  We should terraform our own planet before we go to Mars.  Let's reclaim the Sahara and THEN get to work developing a Green or Blue Mars (excellent book series by the way). 

Or maybe, "No!  Mars and the other Roman Gods were a lie.  Only <insert deity of your choice> is/are our true Lord(s)/Goddess(es)!"

Or "No!  Screw you, Mars Co.!  I invested in Hershey and Nestlé!  You can go to the hells!" get the drift.

So MARS9... wherever you are...  you have failed miserably to communicate your passion with your license plate.  You might consider adding a bumper sticker addendum to clarify.

Quote of the Day: "When you're going through hell, keep going." -Winston Churchill.